8.20.01
kick the set undone
and hit it over west
over the hills thru
sunny monday and sadder saturdays
but i can't feel yr heart beat anymore
i understand almost nothing at all
and i'm tired/but can't sleep
maybe the medications/ i feel shakey
it i'm triple teamed like yesterday-
i'm plain and simply walking away.
8.20.01 MORNING(MOURNING)
WAKE UP
SLEEP ALL DAY
MEEK ATTEMPT TO STARTLE ME
FALLING ON MY SWORD REPEATEDLY
TRYING NOT TO CRY/ OR FALL APART
(all the above text was written backwords in my notebook)
8.20.01
lady that is cute that cleans day room
likes my music/ wanna dance
let people stare and be rude
we'll dance into the mid-day sun light filled day
WHAT THE FUCK?!?!
8.20.01 Now 5:35pm
at long last this mass is
slowly moving off my chest and into the sea
and dark moments are fewer and further
between, involves much work, and
here i go on and on. with the
heart that's been betrayed over over(sic) and
now i'm way beyond myself and
all i am, it's onto other ways to
decorate myself into who i am, and
turn new leafs, reveal new things, i was
always "how i could ever become open?", and
still i wonder, but i think i'm searching,
and building towards where i need to be
done.
(all the above was written while i was hospitized for the first time...)
